Brian Gano 0:21 Yeah, it's, uh, I had a chance to look at your, your website and give it to hear a little bit about your story and your I think it's just, it's pretty awesome what you do so Russell Lehmann 0:40 thank you. I really appreciate that. Brian Gano 0:43 Yeah, Carrie, I'm assuming you know, Carrie. Yeah. She I, I'm in 2000s 2004 alumni for the EY LF. Okay. It's been a while. And I occasionally just do some do some stuff, you know, here and there for for the mayor, wonderful organization. And, and she just said, Hey, can you interview this fellow as I go? Yeah, absolutely. I would love to, and I love meeting new people. And it's been a while since I've interviewed a person. So we bear with me. Russell Lehmann 1:34 And I'm curious to find out. It's a pleasure to connect with you, Brian. Brian Gano 1:38 Yes. Awesome. So it's, did you see the pic the questions I sent you already? did? Yes. Awesome. So I'm gonna start out with what is your name and where you're from. Russell Lehmann 1:54 My name is Russell Lehmann. I'm a motivational speaker and spoken word poet. My platform is autism, mental health disabilities. I happen to have autism. And I am currently I'm from Seattle, Washington, but I'm currently residing in Los Angeles, California. Brian Gano 2:09 Wow, awesome. Well, this is kind of answers. The second question is, do you have any hobbies or with the line of work or anything like that? Russell Lehmann 2:21 Yeah, I guess my biggest hobby would be kind of my work. I mean, I'm very passionate about empowering individuals with disabilities to fulfill their potential to become independent as they see fit, whatever that means for them and their own life and to just create a more open minded world where we can, you know, have a broader perspective on what the human condition encompasses whether that's disability race, gender, but I love you know, just empowering and motivating people to not necessarily turn their back on the struggle, but stare back at it so you can find the success within it. Brian Gano 2:54 That's, that's awesome. I like that. And then, Gertie answer this, but do you have a disability? Russell Lehmann 3:05 Yeah, so I have autism. As I said, I was diagnosed at age 12. But I also have severe OCD, diagnosed with depression, anxiety, panic disorder. And unfortunately, you know, it's quite common. I was diagnosed with PTSD, which is, like I said, quite common, unfortunately with those with disabilities. Brian Gano 3:24 Wow. So does your disability affect you on a daily basis? Russell Lehmann 3:34 Yeah, it does. And it's obviously it fluctuates day to day on how much it affects me but even on the best of days, you know, there are things where I always have to keep my eyes I have to keep myself on the lookout, you know, of this invisible disability creeping up on me whether that's sensory overload, whether that's exhaustion leading to a meltdown, whether that's my rituals and obsessions and compulsions for my OCD, there's a lot I have to kind of juggle with on a daily basis. And I you know, as I get older, I'm 31 now I think I can learn more about my disabilities and have turned them into super abilities. At the same time, though, I don't ignore the struggle every day is a struggle, but like I said, I was able to find success within that struggle. So I'm, I'm proud of the journey. It's been a difficult one but a most rewarding one. Awesome. Brian Gano 4:22 Well, I I'll just go off script a little bit. Share with you. I have a brain injury, traumatic brain injury. And so autism and brain injuries are similar in the same area. So I'm, I wouldn't consider myself neurotypical. But is it's nice to meet other people. Whoo Hoo, quote unquote normals. I, I don't really define the difference, or that it's all like I don't know how to describe it i Let's say I never really felt like I was like, super in one classifications. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. Yeah, Russell Lehmann 5:26 it's definitely a struggle to find where you do fit in and then trying to fit in. It's a very complex thing. We, I think, you know, you know, all too well, it's trying to be part of this world every day is kind of a struggle. But again, that's what makes I think you and me passionate about making this world a little bit more accepting for us? Yes, Brian Gano 5:44 absolutely. So I'm gonna go into this. So as you probably know, like a lot of people with disabilities may or may not experience a struggle with like a body image, a situation self aware of what other people think about them, and whatnot. Have you ever experienced any of that? Body? Body image issues? Russell Lehmann 6:21 Yeah. When I was, I never really experienced it until my late teens when they aged 19 And then a kind of gotten stronger. Throughout my early 20s. My OCD actually morphed into anorexia when I was 21. And that's when I really started to be very, hyper conscious of my body image, I was diagnosed with body dysmorphic disorder. And it's, it's been a lifelong, not a lifelong struggle. But for the past 10 years, it's been a vehement struggle, like to this day, even though I love my body, I'm still very insecure about at the same time. Yeah. And even though I, you know, people tell me, I might have a great body, that doesn't mean anything, unfortunately, because I might know that, but it feels like I don't write and knowing and feeling are two different things. So it's something that I struggle with to this day. And it's in the past, it used to be very hard, I used to bully myself, I'll be honest, I used to bully myself, I would look in the mirror and, and just wish I had a different body almost any other body than the body I had, because it was almost so painful for me to look at. So it's been a very difficult journey of self acceptance, self love of self compassion, and realizing that, you know, my body is a part of me, and I love Russell and I need to learn how to love my body as well. So Brian Gano 7:44 I have a question, how, where was the turning point? Or where did you start noticing you're on the on the positive versus going backwards? How does that work? Russell Lehmann 7:59 Yeah, I think I think it's gotten a lot better in the last nine months in the last nine months is when I actually moved to Los Angeles. In the last nine months, first nine months of my life, I've been fully independent. And I think now having kind of more things going on in my life, whether that's, you know, I have friends for the first time since age 15, I have a part time job besides for my speaking career, the more fulfilling my life is, the less time I have to obsess about my body. And so now, I have, you know, I'm much more accepting of my body than I was this time last year. And again, I think that comes with having great relationships with the outside world, whether that's through friends or work. I think that validation of me as a human helps dissipate my body image struggle because I think when we struggle with our body image, we want we it because we want to be accepted. We want not only us to be accepted, but our bodies as well. So if we can develop more fulfilling relationships, for me anyway, that tends to lower my obsession about how my body looks Brian Gano 9:09 awesome. I you know, I really appreciate your transparency. I think you're willing to be vulnerable and share will help other people down the line and I really appreciate that. Russell Lehmann 9:27 Thank you. I hope so too. Yeah, cuz it's, it's a difficult thing you know, as much as again body um, into mind is a tricky thing. You know, the mind will play tricks on you. And the trick is just kind of be aware that it's playing a trick and to not get sucked into the trick because that's when you can kind of go down that rabbit hole and into some pretty dark places. Brian Gano 9:50 If you can give our persons advice maybe one or two things That would give a person advice about their self body image. What would it be? Russell Lehmann 10:09 Yeah, I would, I would definitely advise. First and foremost, if, if you get like, I used to get triggered every time I would look in the mirror, right? But I would still look in the mirror, even though I knew it wasn't good for me. So if you can be aware of what triggers your anxiety around your body, I would urge you to try to you know, stay away from that, whether that's, you know, you could cover the mirrors, if you want you anything to try to kind of reset your frame of mind. Again, try not to go into circumstances like I know, if I go to the beach, it's a trigger, because, you know, I'm expected to take my shirt off, and I'm not comfortable doing that yet. So take baby steps, you know, maybe take your, if you're a male, you know, maybe try taking your shirt off in your house alone, and just see how it feels right, don't just jump into something like going to the beach, don't jump into it all the way, at the beginning. And, you know, I think the biggest thing is, is self care, and there's and self love. And I think there's little things we can do such as, when I wake up every morning, I will give myself a pat on the back and just say good morning, Russell, I will look in the mirror and say I love you Russell, just those little things throughout the day that can cultivate our love for ourselves will generalize over not into only loving how our mind and our brain works, but how our body works, too, because the mind and body connection is very important to develop that balance and well being throughout our lives. Brian Gano 11:33 Yes, that's, I agree with that, too. You know, self talk is so important. You know, we don't think that the influence that we have over ourselves when we speak about ourselves, but we can start something small, can change like a wave pattern, you know, it gets bigger and bigger, like a wave? Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. Russell Lehmann 12:01 Yeah. And I think you know, too, if individuals can find an outlet, you know, I found an outlet through poetry in my early 20s, where I could kind of write down my frustrations with my body. And to be able to turn it into a piece of art, such as a poem was cathartic. Because now it wasn't just a struggle for nothing, it was a struggle that became a piece of art. So if individuals can find an outlet, whether that's something active or like riding or even painting, painting is a great way to just kind of express yourself, and that is advocating, right, you are expressing yourself you're advocating, you might not be advocating to others, but you're advocating to yourself, and that is very much needed when you struggle with your body image. Brian Gano 12:40 Absolutely. Awesome. Well, I have a final question is, what do you think we could do to encourage others to empower those with disabilities? Russell Lehmann 12:55 Yeah, I think the biggest thing is one of the biggest things anyways, validation, I think we really need to validate individuals with disabilities and the struggles they encounter on a daily basis. Every day, you know, pretty much as you know, let's be honest, individuals with disabilities tend to live in much more difficult life than the mat, vast majority of the population. And if we can give that validation to these individuals that I see you, you know, I see your work and every day, just to sometimes get out of bed, this world is hard to fit in with. I think if we can validate the struggles, you'll make these individuals more open to talking about them, right, if we can just be a little bit more emotionally vulnerable. It's very scary at first, but it's extremely empowering once you get the hang of it to be able to talk about yourself, openly and not judge yourself. And realize that when you do talk about yourself very openly and being vulnerable, you'd be surprised at how many people will confide in you as well, to just kind of have that reciprocal trusting bond of being vulnerable with one another. I think that leads not to not only self empowerment, but to community empowerment throughout the disability community. Brian Gano 14:08 Well, I think that's, that's excellent. I A, I you know, sometimes I have difficulty getting my words out even though I can make them but I do want to say that I highly appreciate your words. And i i Thank you for your time. And your your willingness to not only self advocate, but advocate for others and, and even maybe in a in a different format than you know, motivational speaking. You just never know who you're going to inspire you know. So It's a it's a life journey, you know? And, and everybody's unique and I I'm unique dude, you know, and there's no one size fits all and you know, so I really appreciate your time and what you do for others. And it's and I hope to I'm going to follow you on your website. So catch up and I maybe buy a book or two from your from your store, I saw that you got some books there. So my, my mother, she's a paraprofessional, out of school. She has worked with children with all various disabilities, I, I became close to a few people who happened to have autism on the spectrum, so I I just see it another person, you know, and just because the outer parents is not a certain way, it's about me, there's something inside just like developing with my brain injury. It took me many years for me to articulate what I'm what I'm thinking or what I'm saying. So there's a will there's a way I say that. I appreciate your time. Russell Lehmann 16:52 Absolutely. Absolutely. Brian, it's been a pleasure. You're a very good guy, get a lot of good energy from you. And thank you for sharing about your journey as well. As you know, we've only had a brief 20 minutes here, but I've enjoyed learning about you and yeah, stay in touch. You have my email, you have my website. So stay in touch. Brian Gano 17:10 Amen. Awesome. Are you having an excellent day, enjoy. Russell Lehmann 17:14 Thank you. You as well Brian. Bye bye. Bye bye. Transcribed by https://otter.ai